SUBMITTED ANONYMOUSLY ABOUT HUDSON’S STORY:
This young man is an inspiration to so many. While a normal kid one day then having OCD take over the next, was a complete devastation.
During each flare Hudson has endured, he has had some of the most articulate expressions and descriptions of what it feels like to be trapped behind the bars of PANDAS. I share these here to give you a glimpse into the thoughts of a child dealing with this, and to encourage you to ask your own child to express to you what they feel like. It’s eye opening and sometimes just sharing these words with your doctor will invoke more empathy.
At the age of 8 he wrote the following poem
“My heart is burning, my feelings are turning
If you were me, you would want to be free.”
At the very beginning of his 3rd flare (age 11, Jan 2019), he showed me this lava lamp type thing that sits on his desk and said: “When I don’t have PANDAS, this is how I feel (top image): clear-headed with a mind full of idea bubbles.” Then he turned it upside down and explained “When I have PANDAS, my head is full of frightening thoughts and worries, I can’t think straight and all my happy, good ideas are pushed way, way down.”
This is just a bit of what one goes through when struggling with this debilitating disease. Hudson, along with many others, struggle everyday and learn to fight through it all.
Hudson has also written a book called My-PANDAS-Story-by-Hudson.pdf